How to Autoregulate Your Habits

Your best intentions to develop a new habit may be thwarted by diving in too hard and fast. However, there are ways to set yourself up for success.

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In cultivating a new habit—such as exercise, meditation, waking early, or journaling—we tend to go all out. In doing so, we may be setting ourselves up for failure.

I have a friend who wanted to start running, for example. Every time he went out to run, he ran as fast as he could and ended up getting winded right off the bat. That’s what I call “too fast and too soon,” and for most, it will lead only to failure.

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Another person I talked to wanted to start waking up at 5 a.m.—two hours earlier than usual. After a few days, she admitted she was worried she wouldn’t be able to stick to it for long. I agree, with a hard start like that, you’ll likely crash and burn.

Going hardcore for change is possible if you dedicate your entire life to achieving that goal and reduce all other commitments and stressors. Depending on the scope of your intention, you might have to set up substantial structure and support to make it work; otherwise, your odds of long-term success go way down, much like the results of a crash diet.

So I recommend easing in with a sophisticated technique I call “autoregulation” (borrowed from biology terminology) that I’d like to share with you.

5 Steps for Autoregulation

1. Start small. Try 15 minutes of easy exercise at first, or wake up just five minutes earlier than your normal time on day 1.

2. Increase the next day. Increase exercise by two minutes a day and wake up five minutes earlier.

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3. Continue to increase daily. Be sure you have achieved your goal of the day before—if not, continue that until you have—then continue to add time each day.

4. Decrease if you miss a day. If on day 3 you intended to wake at 6:45 a.m. but slept until 7:30 a.m., on day 4, set your alarm for 6:50 a.m. If you missed a day of exercise, decrease the exercise time by two minutes the next day. It’s important to see this not as a setback, but rather as an adjustment for your long-term success.

5. Skip a day if needed—Take a full day off if you’re tired, stressed, or too busy. Start the next day, if at all possible, with a decrease in the new habit (see No. 4).

By following this autoregulation method, you’ll achieve your intended new habit with ease.

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It’s OK to ease off on days you feel too busy, tired, or stressed. Start back the next day with the decreased habit goal to make it easier for yourself.

Some days, you may have extra energy and focus. On those days, it’s entirely appropriate to continue to increase the habit even more.

Set Yourself Up for Success

This time-based approach works for developing many habits, such as meditation, journaling, writing, and learning a language. You can use the same basic principles for dieting, too: Slowly move closer to your target eating pattern each day, give yourself breaks, and slow your progress as needed.

If your goal is to create a habit of less procrastination (which may keep you from trying this!), start by doing short focus sessions for the task you’ve been putting off—begin with 10 minutes once a day and increase by 10 minutes until you’ve completed the task. For example, on day 2, do a 20-minute focus session. On day 3, do one 10-minute focus session and later one 20-minute focus session. On day 4, do two 20-minute focus sessions. Keep adding 10 minutes until you develop a habit of getting things done.

Once you’ve reached or even surpassed your goal, you can stop increasing. Your goal may evolve as you go along, and you'll find the level of success that’s just right for you.

The autoregulation method for changing habits is a compassionate approach that’s meant to increase your odds of long-term success. Give it a shot!